Stan Here:
Had this old Sunday school song called "Marching Along". I cannot remember what it was all about but I do remember the tune and the title so I thought I would use it for this post because that is what I think is happening. Now, the marching is not all that fast yet and I am not really sure what we are seeing is marching, but non-the-less we are moving in a forward direction and still thinking and hoping for a return to home on this Wednesday. Deb is working her way through some problems still with nasea and weakness. This is now day 32 of this whole thing and I think for Deb and the rest of us it seems like it started in another century. Anyway, it has been a long time and everyone is ready to for it to come to a happy conclusion.
It seems evident to me that the recovery period for this is going to go for some time yet. Deb's Mom and Dad are going to come over for some days to help out when she first gets home. We are all going to try to attend the graduation events we have coming up. The medical people have warned me often to be careful of overdoing things so we are going to attempt to make the graduation events be as less exerting as possible. So while it is true that our lawn could use mowing I think I will leave this out of the therapy demands at this time. Actually I think she will find the place in good shape when she comes home. I am not sure how it is all going to work but I am confident that she can make the best progress back in her home from both mental and physical consideration standpoints.
I am thinking when she comes home the Tigers will start winning again. They do much better when Deb cheers for them through her own TV set. We will see.....talk to you all in a day or so. Thanks for following!
Stan
Monday, April 30, 2012
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Strides and Brides
Stan Here:
Thought it might be time for an update so here it comes. While the recovery road still seems long and hard we can all start to tell that each day is bringing some progress. I think I had mentioned earlier that it seemed like a step forward and then one back. Now it seems to be going in the right direction but it still is slow. We have been given the date of next Wednesday as the target release and at this point I see nothing in the way of this. Issues that remain are restoring an appetite that allows for proper nourishment and strength and some problems with nausea. After most attempts to eat a normal meal Deb is finding some real problems with the feeling that we all have had at one time or another with feeling sick. She fights through this pretty well but it takes about one hour after every attempt to consume a normal meal.
Mieke is going through the fun stage of setting up her first home. She and Aaron rented their first apartment. So the fun of setting that all up is perhaps dimmed a bit by the fact that I think it is something that I think she and her mom might have done together. I mentioned earlier that those two have always cherished every friendship and every gift of any kind and I think they might have had fun with it. I am learning that brides to be are rained upon with many fine things. All I want to say here is that at this time in a special way these things have been received and carry a blessing that has extra proportion. I was thinking a little about this when I drove back from taking some things to their place. Deb and I were married 37 years ago and we still use the stuff from that time. I am not sure I have ever been able to get in to the plates and dishes as much. I do recall somehow the partner of Deb's dad giving me a drill. I opened that thing and I just thought it was kind of cool and it was a nice one. I still have it and use it. I think about that every time I use that thing. Anyway a special time for Mieke and Aaron. I recall one of my grandmothers commenting to a cousin of mine. This cousin had worked hard and purchased a home. It was her theory that by the time life reached 25 years or so things should be well along the way. She would always say to him "you have the coop, now you need to find the hen to live in there with you". I am not sure that this was all that modern of a thought. But somehow it did cross my mind after I helped them move a few things. Deb and I like the rooster and we like the hen and I think we are going to have a fun wedding and we are very proud.
I am not sure how I got on all of that. Many of you know that we have some big dates coming up. Ross and Rumy receive their doctoral degrees in music this next Friday and Mieke graduates from Hope next Sunday. Anybody want to put any money on Deb attending these events? I talked with her about this yesterday on if she felt it was wise to try. She told me the issue was not up for discussion. The good money still rest on her attendance at these events.
Stan......
Thought it might be time for an update so here it comes. While the recovery road still seems long and hard we can all start to tell that each day is bringing some progress. I think I had mentioned earlier that it seemed like a step forward and then one back. Now it seems to be going in the right direction but it still is slow. We have been given the date of next Wednesday as the target release and at this point I see nothing in the way of this. Issues that remain are restoring an appetite that allows for proper nourishment and strength and some problems with nausea. After most attempts to eat a normal meal Deb is finding some real problems with the feeling that we all have had at one time or another with feeling sick. She fights through this pretty well but it takes about one hour after every attempt to consume a normal meal.
Mieke is going through the fun stage of setting up her first home. She and Aaron rented their first apartment. So the fun of setting that all up is perhaps dimmed a bit by the fact that I think it is something that I think she and her mom might have done together. I mentioned earlier that those two have always cherished every friendship and every gift of any kind and I think they might have had fun with it. I am learning that brides to be are rained upon with many fine things. All I want to say here is that at this time in a special way these things have been received and carry a blessing that has extra proportion. I was thinking a little about this when I drove back from taking some things to their place. Deb and I were married 37 years ago and we still use the stuff from that time. I am not sure I have ever been able to get in to the plates and dishes as much. I do recall somehow the partner of Deb's dad giving me a drill. I opened that thing and I just thought it was kind of cool and it was a nice one. I still have it and use it. I think about that every time I use that thing. Anyway a special time for Mieke and Aaron. I recall one of my grandmothers commenting to a cousin of mine. This cousin had worked hard and purchased a home. It was her theory that by the time life reached 25 years or so things should be well along the way. She would always say to him "you have the coop, now you need to find the hen to live in there with you". I am not sure that this was all that modern of a thought. But somehow it did cross my mind after I helped them move a few things. Deb and I like the rooster and we like the hen and I think we are going to have a fun wedding and we are very proud.
I am not sure how I got on all of that. Many of you know that we have some big dates coming up. Ross and Rumy receive their doctoral degrees in music this next Friday and Mieke graduates from Hope next Sunday. Anybody want to put any money on Deb attending these events? I talked with her about this yesterday on if she felt it was wise to try. She told me the issue was not up for discussion. The good money still rest on her attendance at these events.
Stan......
Thursday, April 26, 2012
News and Views
Stan Here:
We did learn a couple of things today. First we learned that Deb will not be able to return home till next week. May I relate what for me was a very touching moment. I took Deb in to see the doctor and they did remove the stitches. This is only the second time Deb has smelled the outside air in one month. The exertion of going to this appointment took it's toll but on the way home she said she wanted to see her house again. I did drive her home and she was able to come in and sit at the table for a few moments. She was really not able to respond to the event with the joy we expected. She shed a few tears and had me drive her back to Freedom Inn. As hard as this was for me to watch I get to tell you now something really interesting.
For the first time I heard her surgeon say that the reduction of the cancer that came from the chemo was significant enough that they actually feel that they have a chance to bring her to a cancer free state. He was very clear to emphasize the word "chance." You know something? I think that is what we needed to hear right now. There is a part of me that believes that Deb will pull out of this thing and outlive us all. There is one thing that I know for sure is going to happen. Deb will be attending Mieke's graduation from Hope. She told me yesterday that wild teams of horses would not keep her away from that. It comes up here in a few weeks. The good money will be on her being there!!!!
Stan
We did learn a couple of things today. First we learned that Deb will not be able to return home till next week. May I relate what for me was a very touching moment. I took Deb in to see the doctor and they did remove the stitches. This is only the second time Deb has smelled the outside air in one month. The exertion of going to this appointment took it's toll but on the way home she said she wanted to see her house again. I did drive her home and she was able to come in and sit at the table for a few moments. She was really not able to respond to the event with the joy we expected. She shed a few tears and had me drive her back to Freedom Inn. As hard as this was for me to watch I get to tell you now something really interesting.
For the first time I heard her surgeon say that the reduction of the cancer that came from the chemo was significant enough that they actually feel that they have a chance to bring her to a cancer free state. He was very clear to emphasize the word "chance." You know something? I think that is what we needed to hear right now. There is a part of me that believes that Deb will pull out of this thing and outlive us all. There is one thing that I know for sure is going to happen. Deb will be attending Mieke's graduation from Hope. She told me yesterday that wild teams of horses would not keep her away from that. It comes up here in a few weeks. The good money will be on her being there!!!!
Stan
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Events of the day
Stan Here:
No day is without some events and today was no exception. I could kind of tell this morning when I called that Deb's voice was weaker. After a local business appointment I went to see her and became quite concerned. Intense pain to the point of tears were happening. I was not sure what to do so I called Karen. She just seems to know how to enlist help and do the right thing. She soon had the right people called and as the afternoon progressed things improved to the point that tonite Deb was in much better condition. She was able to enjoy a visit from some nursing friends. I noticed that she is eating better and I think now it is possible to think about her coming home this week. At noon today I would have said we had taken a big reverse step but as the day went on things improved. For those of you that know Karen (I do not use last names for security reasons. It is called blogger protocal) she has been a huge help in this entire matter from the very start. I just am not able to decerne what is the best direction from a medical perspective and she has acted as a consultant on very many occasions. I cannot thank her enough. We needed that help today and she left her work to assist. I think you can tell that this whole thing has somewhat of a roller coaster feel to it. As much as we would like it not to be that way it just simply is. From a medical perspective it is complicated and has with it about everything you can think of. On Wednesday we have an appointment with the doctors and I will update the news very soon. Thanks for following. Hang in there Deb. By the way, we figured out how to get the Tiger games in her room and for her this might be the best medicine.
Stan
No day is without some events and today was no exception. I could kind of tell this morning when I called that Deb's voice was weaker. After a local business appointment I went to see her and became quite concerned. Intense pain to the point of tears were happening. I was not sure what to do so I called Karen. She just seems to know how to enlist help and do the right thing. She soon had the right people called and as the afternoon progressed things improved to the point that tonite Deb was in much better condition. She was able to enjoy a visit from some nursing friends. I noticed that she is eating better and I think now it is possible to think about her coming home this week. At noon today I would have said we had taken a big reverse step but as the day went on things improved. For those of you that know Karen (I do not use last names for security reasons. It is called blogger protocal) she has been a huge help in this entire matter from the very start. I just am not able to decerne what is the best direction from a medical perspective and she has acted as a consultant on very many occasions. I cannot thank her enough. We needed that help today and she left her work to assist. I think you can tell that this whole thing has somewhat of a roller coaster feel to it. As much as we would like it not to be that way it just simply is. From a medical perspective it is complicated and has with it about everything you can think of. On Wednesday we have an appointment with the doctors and I will update the news very soon. Thanks for following. Hang in there Deb. By the way, we figured out how to get the Tiger games in her room and for her this might be the best medicine.
Stan
Monday, April 23, 2012
Showers and Flowers
Stan Here:
The kind of showers I am talking about are not the rain type. Instead they are the type that rain gifts on a to be brides. Mieke had one of those this weekend. Jackie, our friend, put it on and there was quite a bit of conversation as to whether to postpone it or to go ahead. They decided to move the whole deal over to Freedom Inn. Deb was able to attend and enjoy the event. She was good and tired when it got done but it was worth it. You know something, it is kind of like mother like daughter. When the event was over Mieke brought the gifts home and put them all in our living room. She asked me to sit in the chair and one by one she got them out, told me who they were from, and then just spent some time in thanks cherishing the day and the gifts. Sometimes I kind of feel like Steve Martin in that movie "Father of the Bride" but I want to tell you that these events take on special meaning of extra proportion with all of the recent struggles. Deb has always cherished these events and has always been touched by every gift over the years and now I have a daughter just like that.
Now on to the health update. I think the consistent theme has been that the progress is slow but sure. What has been endured is a medical event that at times to me has been stunning. I think I understand that others have endured events that parallel these. It is just that we have never experienced them first hand. I sense now there is some light at the end of the tunnel and it is starting to look like a return to home might be possible sometime this week. I think it is now day 25 of this thing and it just seems like it has been a test and lesson in endurance for which nobody could prepare or imagine. It does however appear that it is getting closer to the finish and it appears that life has the potential to come back to more normal existence.
So we have the shower part but how about the flowers? All I want to say about this is that it would appear that the early spring is going to make the color of the town not be in the forefront when tulip time is here this year. That is going to have exist someplace in the imagination. You know I am going to do that this year. I am getting a little lonely here and it is going to be a fine day when Deb breeches the threshold of our front door. Not sure I will carry her in this time like many years ago. I will leave that to the imagination as well. It has been quite the journey. Thanks again for staying with us.
Stan
The kind of showers I am talking about are not the rain type. Instead they are the type that rain gifts on a to be brides. Mieke had one of those this weekend. Jackie, our friend, put it on and there was quite a bit of conversation as to whether to postpone it or to go ahead. They decided to move the whole deal over to Freedom Inn. Deb was able to attend and enjoy the event. She was good and tired when it got done but it was worth it. You know something, it is kind of like mother like daughter. When the event was over Mieke brought the gifts home and put them all in our living room. She asked me to sit in the chair and one by one she got them out, told me who they were from, and then just spent some time in thanks cherishing the day and the gifts. Sometimes I kind of feel like Steve Martin in that movie "Father of the Bride" but I want to tell you that these events take on special meaning of extra proportion with all of the recent struggles. Deb has always cherished these events and has always been touched by every gift over the years and now I have a daughter just like that.
Now on to the health update. I think the consistent theme has been that the progress is slow but sure. What has been endured is a medical event that at times to me has been stunning. I think I understand that others have endured events that parallel these. It is just that we have never experienced them first hand. I sense now there is some light at the end of the tunnel and it is starting to look like a return to home might be possible sometime this week. I think it is now day 25 of this thing and it just seems like it has been a test and lesson in endurance for which nobody could prepare or imagine. It does however appear that it is getting closer to the finish and it appears that life has the potential to come back to more normal existence.
So we have the shower part but how about the flowers? All I want to say about this is that it would appear that the early spring is going to make the color of the town not be in the forefront when tulip time is here this year. That is going to have exist someplace in the imagination. You know I am going to do that this year. I am getting a little lonely here and it is going to be a fine day when Deb breeches the threshold of our front door. Not sure I will carry her in this time like many years ago. I will leave that to the imagination as well. It has been quite the journey. Thanks again for staying with us.
Stan
Friday, April 20, 2012
Moving Forward
Stan Here:
Slowly but surely we have some progress here. I stopped up this morning to see Deb and it looked like she had a good night of sleep and she looked good. Yesterday Deb's mom and Dad were here. Debs mom went over to our house and helped with lots of things to help get the place ready for a return to home. I had been trying to keep the place in order but it sure looks a lot better with her touch. Some of our neigborhood friends gave us the gift of having the house cleaned and they hired someone to come in today put a spit shine on the place. I am sensing that there might be some people who do not totally trust my skill level in that area. When I saw the place after Deb's mom got done I think they are right.
I am thinking that the release from Freedom Inn is getting closer. I think this is Day 23 of this whole thing and it has the rigors of hospitals and rehab can have a wearing affect. In my judgement the lack of sleep is not helping the healing and Dr. Stan thinks that if I can find a way to get her home things will be better for her. I called a few of her friends and asked that if she does come home if they could possibly stay with her during the day for at least the first couple of days. I am not sure when this going to happen but I can tell it is getting closer. Plus, they do not get the Tiger games at Freedom Inn and I am also thinking that she might need that back in her life. If I had my choice I would load her in the car and take her home, but she just called me and told me to cool that idea. She wants things done in a more official way. Those of you that know us well might know that I like to spend some time in the less official world and I am sensing that this might not be the right time for that. So for now room 2140 will still be occupied. (At least for a short time more.)
So we will see what happpens. I will keep you posted. Thanks to all for your concerns, prayers and for your generous gifts of time, meals, flowers, cards, cleaning and everything else that has been given to us. Deb and I often talk about the kindness that people have shown over this entire time going way back to last August. It is truly appreciated and has had a deep impact on us.
Stan
Slowly but surely we have some progress here. I stopped up this morning to see Deb and it looked like she had a good night of sleep and she looked good. Yesterday Deb's mom and Dad were here. Debs mom went over to our house and helped with lots of things to help get the place ready for a return to home. I had been trying to keep the place in order but it sure looks a lot better with her touch. Some of our neigborhood friends gave us the gift of having the house cleaned and they hired someone to come in today put a spit shine on the place. I am sensing that there might be some people who do not totally trust my skill level in that area. When I saw the place after Deb's mom got done I think they are right.
I am thinking that the release from Freedom Inn is getting closer. I think this is Day 23 of this whole thing and it has the rigors of hospitals and rehab can have a wearing affect. In my judgement the lack of sleep is not helping the healing and Dr. Stan thinks that if I can find a way to get her home things will be better for her. I called a few of her friends and asked that if she does come home if they could possibly stay with her during the day for at least the first couple of days. I am not sure when this going to happen but I can tell it is getting closer. Plus, they do not get the Tiger games at Freedom Inn and I am also thinking that she might need that back in her life. If I had my choice I would load her in the car and take her home, but she just called me and told me to cool that idea. She wants things done in a more official way. Those of you that know us well might know that I like to spend some time in the less official world and I am sensing that this might not be the right time for that. So for now room 2140 will still be occupied. (At least for a short time more.)
So we will see what happpens. I will keep you posted. Thanks to all for your concerns, prayers and for your generous gifts of time, meals, flowers, cards, cleaning and everything else that has been given to us. Deb and I often talk about the kindness that people have shown over this entire time going way back to last August. It is truly appreciated and has had a deep impact on us.
Stan
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Perspective of a Mom
Deb's Mom,Sylvia:
This is coming from someone who hasn' t seen her since she left the intensive care unit, so to me she has made some real strides. Her pain is still a real issue, so we are very thankful for medication. She saw her surgeon today and I think he was pleased with her recovery so far. (Now Stan Writing). I think a few of Sylvia's lines got clipped off and now reside someplace in cyberspace. So let me finish with some of her thoughts and mine. She came to to visit and had not seen Deb since the ICU. I asked her how she felt regarding her observations on everything and she said that she felt things were about as she expected. Those of us who see Deb everyday sometimes have a tough time seeing the progress but others who have seen her at larger intervals think she is moving along well on the progress scale.
Yesterday Laurie, (Aarons Mom) took Deb into GR to an appointment with the surgeons. They removed the staples and checked things over. It would appear at this point that we have about another week at Freedom Village. Laurie said that Deb endured the trip well but was really tired after the whole thing was done. She did tell me that the doctors talked with her about the serious nature of the condition. They claimed that they and Deb should be thankful for life as the nature of the procedings and complications were very advanced from a medical perspective. It has now been three weeks since the initial surgery. Those closest to the matter have observed that Deb has endured the events with great drive and stamina at a level that I think many of us can only imagine. She walks the halls quite often and the pain involved in getting up and down, doing the therapy and all other elements of the rehab is sometimes painfull to observe.
Related to visiting it can sometimes be sort of a moving target. Deb's cell phone is 616-299-2996. She has been able to handle some calls and some text while at the same time there are times when the rehab people keep her busy. Deb's Mom and Dad will be with her today and I will keep you posted on her progress as best I can.
This is coming from someone who hasn' t seen her since she left the intensive care unit, so to me she has made some real strides. Her pain is still a real issue, so we are very thankful for medication. She saw her surgeon today and I think he was pleased with her recovery so far. (Now Stan Writing). I think a few of Sylvia's lines got clipped off and now reside someplace in cyberspace. So let me finish with some of her thoughts and mine. She came to to visit and had not seen Deb since the ICU. I asked her how she felt regarding her observations on everything and she said that she felt things were about as she expected. Those of us who see Deb everyday sometimes have a tough time seeing the progress but others who have seen her at larger intervals think she is moving along well on the progress scale.
Yesterday Laurie, (Aarons Mom) took Deb into GR to an appointment with the surgeons. They removed the staples and checked things over. It would appear at this point that we have about another week at Freedom Village. Laurie said that Deb endured the trip well but was really tired after the whole thing was done. She did tell me that the doctors talked with her about the serious nature of the condition. They claimed that they and Deb should be thankful for life as the nature of the procedings and complications were very advanced from a medical perspective. It has now been three weeks since the initial surgery. Those closest to the matter have observed that Deb has endured the events with great drive and stamina at a level that I think many of us can only imagine. She walks the halls quite often and the pain involved in getting up and down, doing the therapy and all other elements of the rehab is sometimes painfull to observe.
Related to visiting it can sometimes be sort of a moving target. Deb's cell phone is 616-299-2996. She has been able to handle some calls and some text while at the same time there are times when the rehab people keep her busy. Deb's Mom and Dad will be with her today and I will keep you posted on her progress as best I can.
Monday, April 16, 2012
Inspiration of the Tulips
Every season has behind it a reason. When we brought Deb to Freedom Inn a day ago she asked Mieke to drive down some of the more prominent areas of Holland where the tulips are now in full display. Some things never change. Deb has never found a tulip time she did not like and I think she knew that the rehab was going to be hard. So she got to see the flowers in full bloom before we committed her to the rehab place. Freedom Inn is a good place. They practice an art that I might call "Dutch Love". For those of you that have not experienced this it means that the care, the food,and the love is sent out in extra proportion.
Some years ago Deb's dad had a liver transplant. The surgeries needed for this resulted in some very advanced scars in his midsection. He survived the surgeries but some years later he was sitting at a pool and the guy next to him observed him. He took one look and said, "I hope they found what they were looking for". I use this now to tell you you that the procedures of the past weeks fall someplace in this league. In other words the it is hard for me to imagine the level of pain. At the same time steps towards recovery are being made. It is a long and slow and filled with obstacles but we are gaining.
Stay with us. We are not there yet but we are moving forward.
Stan
Stan
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Back to the Homeland
This day brought many good things. At the very top of the list was the trip back to Holland with Deb in the car. Thursday I would have said this was impossible but these last 2 days have shown big progress. She has now taken up residence at Freedom Inn here in Holland. My guess is that it will be about a week. I want to post more in the morning on some of the details of this day. For now she is pretty wiped out. We both have been impressed with the surroundings she has now. I am thinking that some her local friends might want to see her. At Freedom Inn they do not have private rooms. I think it might be smart, if some people wish to do so, that they give me text or call.(616-293-1274). I am going to go up there in the morning and size up the condition. If I asked her she would say she wants to see everybody who might want to come. I have been warned many times by her doctors that overdoing can quickly result in a downturn. I do not have all that much going Sunday so I will try to give those that wish to see my best appraisal on what I think is best.
I must tell you that this is one of the more gallant efforts in recovery that I could have imagined. She worked very hard to get where she is right now and she did it faster than I thought. I want to take a moment to thank our friend Jackie who helped us with the move and has helped in so many ways in this entire matter. More next time but for now rejoice with me in this news. Thanks for following!!!!!!
Stan
Friday, April 13, 2012
Vital Signs
Karen here (Deb’s friend)
Stan asked me to come and spend some time with Deb today so that I might offer and share a “nurse’s perspective” relating to her journey to recovery. As those of you in health care know, this progress and movement forward is most often measured by concrete documentation of normal vital signs such as temperature, blood pressure, heart rate and/or good oxygen levels in the blood. While all of these are definitely great gauges of progress, there are other “vital signs” that cannot be displayed via digital readouts and beeps. I would like to share a few of these with you in this posting.
Vital sign #1 SMILE.
It is back. Her smile has returned. Her eyes danced with joy when I walked in the room. I know they will do the same for all of you as she returns to Holland in the very near future. This is the Deb we know. It has always been said that the eyes are the windows to the soul. She has been smiling so much this morning, interspersed with a fair amount of wincing with discomfort. However, three staff members have already commented how MUCH better controlled her pain is today. Deb agreed with them. Although still with a fair amount of discomfort and shortness of breath due to movement, it appears that there has been definite progress with the conversion to oral pain medication. Smile Vital Sign? Pass!
Vital sign #2: Humor
Deb was up 4 times this morning, WALKING UNASSISTED with her walker! She really enjoyed her “personal assistant student nurse” (as we called him). He would walk right behind her carrying her water cup. He is about to graduate from Grand Valley Nursing Program. He was fantastic, anticipating her every need for comfort. Deb and I feel confident that he is going to be out there someday compassionately caring for families in their time of need. Deb has the ability to interject bits and pieces of humor that brings smiles to all staff on this floor. Imagine Deb pushing her walker around the entire unit, beginning to pick up some speed and exclaiming, “Run Forrest. Run!” We are all going to have to watch this lady!
Humor Vital Sign? Pass
Vital sign #3: Determination
Deb has been up three times already today. She grabs that trapeze bar, grinds her teeth and amidst muffled groans gets to the side of the bed. This is not easy for her to do, nor is it pain free. She still has quite a bit of residual pain due to the surgery which involved the cutting of a lot of muscles in her abdomen. Have you ever overdone abdominal crunches only to barely move the next day or two? I think this is what she must feel…although it is probably 20 X worse. Hopefully with continued physical therapy this will begin to abate. I have NEVER seen someone with her determination and resolve. She still gets quite short of breath after any exertion and needs to close her eyes and take frequent rest periods/sleep.
There are so many other things, but I will close for now. There is definite progress but she still has a lot of healing to do. The discharge planner came in this morning and shared the good news that there is a bed waiting for her at the Inn at Freedom Village. The temporary plan is that Deb may be able to transfer there possibly Sunday or Monday. This is still tentative but is such good news and affirms her progress on this road to recovery. Her doctor will make the determination over the next couple of days. Regardless of the timing, it is in the not-so-distant future.
To God Be The Glory.
She says, “My name is Debra Hoksbergen, RN and I approve this message;)
Thursday, April 12, 2012
update from Ross
I am sitting here in the bed and Mom is sitting in the chair. After ten minutes I started to complain about a bad back because of the angle of this bed... I can barely imagine how two weeks would feel. We went on a 'long' walk earlier which was basically down the hallway about twenty feet and back. I am happy to have a little time just with me and her here because when you are the only one here it feels like you actually can help a little bit, and when there are many people here, it's easy to just be in the way.
Overall, her condition is showing steady signs of improvement. There are no longer any signs of fever, although she is still in quite a bit of pain from the incision. With all of the medical advancements in the last 50 years, I am amazed that we still use 'staples' on a persons body.
Mary, (Alden's wife) just showed up and she thinks Mom looks great compared to yesterday... a sign of the daily improvements in Mom's condition. She is going to be able to take a shower in about an hour and I know from her face and the way she is talking about it that she is ready and excited for this!
I wish there was no need to write this blog, but happy that there are so many people reading it and contributing to the healing process. Carol dropped a book off today (from Marcia) titled "Chicken Soup for the Survivor". After reading many of the stories, I noticed that humor is considered by many to be one of the greatest healers of people when they are sick. So I tried to think of something funny to say... I can't do it.
As many of you know, Mom likes a good joke and if you have one to share or have a story that will make us laugh, feel free to share it.
Thanks,
Ross
Overall, her condition is showing steady signs of improvement. There are no longer any signs of fever, although she is still in quite a bit of pain from the incision. With all of the medical advancements in the last 50 years, I am amazed that we still use 'staples' on a persons body.
Mary, (Alden's wife) just showed up and she thinks Mom looks great compared to yesterday... a sign of the daily improvements in Mom's condition. She is going to be able to take a shower in about an hour and I know from her face and the way she is talking about it that she is ready and excited for this!
I wish there was no need to write this blog, but happy that there are so many people reading it and contributing to the healing process. Carol dropped a book off today (from Marcia) titled "Chicken Soup for the Survivor". After reading many of the stories, I noticed that humor is considered by many to be one of the greatest healers of people when they are sick. So I tried to think of something funny to say... I can't do it.
As many of you know, Mom likes a good joke and if you have one to share or have a story that will make us laugh, feel free to share it.
Thanks,
Ross
Pray for pain control
Laurie here (Aaron's mom):
Deb's IV's were discontinued last night and she is now on oral pain medication. They do have an IV push pain med. (via a port) as a back-up if needed. She was in quite a bit of pain today so it's going to be a little bit of trial and error to determine what is going to work best. Physical therapy and respiratory therapy are coming in every day, which are necessary, but it really wears her out. The plan is to move her to a rehab. facility here in Holland in the next few days (hopefully The Inn at Freedom Village). Stan will let you know when she's up for visitors, but right now it's best if she just rests. The focus is pain control, healing and regaining her strength. Please pray for the right meds to relieve her pain and that there will be an opening at The Inn. Thank you all for your prayers....God hears every one!
Deb's IV's were discontinued last night and she is now on oral pain medication. They do have an IV push pain med. (via a port) as a back-up if needed. She was in quite a bit of pain today so it's going to be a little bit of trial and error to determine what is going to work best. Physical therapy and respiratory therapy are coming in every day, which are necessary, but it really wears her out. The plan is to move her to a rehab. facility here in Holland in the next few days (hopefully The Inn at Freedom Village). Stan will let you know when she's up for visitors, but right now it's best if she just rests. The focus is pain control, healing and regaining her strength. Please pray for the right meds to relieve her pain and that there will be an opening at The Inn. Thank you all for your prayers....God hears every one!
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Day 14
Stan Here:
Seems hard to believe but this is the 14th day for Deb up here. It would appear that in 3-4 more days there is at least the possibility of her getting out of here. Nobody has really told us that yet, it just seems to me that it might be possible. One thing that I have noticed. I would have pictured recovery to somewhat more of a steady process. What happens instead is when you leave one day and things seem have made progress. Then you come in the very next morning and things may have taken a step the other way.
That is what happened this morning. It does not appear to be anything serious. Alden stayed with Deb last night and reported a higher level of pain than before and the medication needed to help with that caused some groggy and slightly confused condition. This pain stuff they use up here can play with your head in a bad way. I think Deb might have so much of it in her body that the cumulative result is a body that just needs a break.
I had arranged for a few people to come up and see her today but I called them and thought we better delay that for at least a day. I asked her and she said she did not think she could do the visits. And for her you know she has to be hurting to say something like that. One other thing that did not work quite like I thought is that it seems to me that her breaths are still short. I was hoping that after they took all that fluid off of the lungs this might improve. If it has I cannot notice it. There have been moments when we move her that a little panic comes in the picture. It feels to her that she not getting her next breath. I wish I could write a better report but that is just the way it is. I remember that some years ago we were going someplace and she was late getting ready. I asked her what was going on. She yelled downstairs and she said she felt like ---- and she looked like ----. Fill in the blanks there and you pretty much have what this day has been like for her.
Now that I am learning to use this blogging tool I wondered if any of you have any questions. If you would like to know something and put it in the comment section I will reply in the reply section for all to read.
On a totally different subject I have been wondering about something now after some days have been spent alone at home. Here is the question. We have three bathrooms in the house. I have only used one. But the others are getting a noticeable ring where the water tops. What I am trying to figure out is how this might be possible since they use city water. I am finding that taking care of things there is a little more work than I thought. Deb and I have argued for years on who was making the mess. Don't tell when she gets better but the possibility is coming clear that I might have some responsibility in this area. I also think laundry is a larger pain than I knew. My stuff is coming out in a wrinkled blob. So it needs a bunch of ironing before it can be used. When she gets home I think she will come home to the Martha Stewart of mandome. Gotta prove a point here. Also quite thankful for her doing this stuff for all these years.
Stan the Man
Seems hard to believe but this is the 14th day for Deb up here. It would appear that in 3-4 more days there is at least the possibility of her getting out of here. Nobody has really told us that yet, it just seems to me that it might be possible. One thing that I have noticed. I would have pictured recovery to somewhat more of a steady process. What happens instead is when you leave one day and things seem have made progress. Then you come in the very next morning and things may have taken a step the other way.
That is what happened this morning. It does not appear to be anything serious. Alden stayed with Deb last night and reported a higher level of pain than before and the medication needed to help with that caused some groggy and slightly confused condition. This pain stuff they use up here can play with your head in a bad way. I think Deb might have so much of it in her body that the cumulative result is a body that just needs a break.
I had arranged for a few people to come up and see her today but I called them and thought we better delay that for at least a day. I asked her and she said she did not think she could do the visits. And for her you know she has to be hurting to say something like that. One other thing that did not work quite like I thought is that it seems to me that her breaths are still short. I was hoping that after they took all that fluid off of the lungs this might improve. If it has I cannot notice it. There have been moments when we move her that a little panic comes in the picture. It feels to her that she not getting her next breath. I wish I could write a better report but that is just the way it is. I remember that some years ago we were going someplace and she was late getting ready. I asked her what was going on. She yelled downstairs and she said she felt like ---- and she looked like ----. Fill in the blanks there and you pretty much have what this day has been like for her.
Now that I am learning to use this blogging tool I wondered if any of you have any questions. If you would like to know something and put it in the comment section I will reply in the reply section for all to read.
On a totally different subject I have been wondering about something now after some days have been spent alone at home. Here is the question. We have three bathrooms in the house. I have only used one. But the others are getting a noticeable ring where the water tops. What I am trying to figure out is how this might be possible since they use city water. I am finding that taking care of things there is a little more work than I thought. Deb and I have argued for years on who was making the mess. Don't tell when she gets better but the possibility is coming clear that I might have some responsibility in this area. I also think laundry is a larger pain than I knew. My stuff is coming out in a wrinkled blob. So it needs a bunch of ironing before it can be used. When she gets home I think she will come home to the Martha Stewart of mandome. Gotta prove a point here. Also quite thankful for her doing this stuff for all these years.
Stan the Man
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Bad start good end.
Stan here:
A little bit of a yo-yo day but the yo-yo ended in the up position. Shortly after I made the the post last night I got a call that Deb's temperature was high again. This was not the news we wanted. It was how we found out we had problems over a week ago with the infection and quickly led to all the rest. It worked out better this time. Turns out that all evidence pointed in the direction of the temp being caused by to much fluid on the lungs. I had noticed this over these past days as Deb breaths were shorter and whenever they would move her even in the bed she was having problems drawing good breaths.
They took her down today to get a procedure of removing the fluids in the lungs with a needle. I was not supposed to hurt but she told me it did. When she came back up to the room I found her eating her first meal. I looked like jello and maybe some broth. But a meal it was. All in all great strides were made on this day. There have even been moments when the sense of humor and the smile was back. I need one more day to figure out what to tell the people who have asked if they can visit. I am concerned that well meaning visits may have the result of going backwards. She loves all her friends so much that she might say have them all come over. What I have done here is ask a few people that have medical experience if they could visit on Wednesday. She is still very weak and the doctors have warned me that as much as she would like it there is the chance that a huge step backwards might happen if this is not done right.
She has huge resolve. She has one of those trapeze type devices on her bed and whenever she gets the chance she is pulling on that thing. She knows what she needs to do to get better. Nancy washed her hair this morning and did a fine job of helping her and advising all of us on how best to handle. She stayed overnight 2 nights. I cannot thank her enough. Some of you that know our family know that she also has faced come recent medical issues. But she helped us in this time at a level that that will always be remembered.
Oh, and by the way, Deb just moved off of the ICU. I will post again in the morning. Seems like new stuff comes all of the time. Two day ago I started to think that Deb might not ever walk through our front door again. Now I can kind of see her on the front porch asking me why the leaves have not been blown off. I think I better take care of that right now. It was a good day!
Stan
A little bit of a yo-yo day but the yo-yo ended in the up position. Shortly after I made the the post last night I got a call that Deb's temperature was high again. This was not the news we wanted. It was how we found out we had problems over a week ago with the infection and quickly led to all the rest. It worked out better this time. Turns out that all evidence pointed in the direction of the temp being caused by to much fluid on the lungs. I had noticed this over these past days as Deb breaths were shorter and whenever they would move her even in the bed she was having problems drawing good breaths.
They took her down today to get a procedure of removing the fluids in the lungs with a needle. I was not supposed to hurt but she told me it did. When she came back up to the room I found her eating her first meal. I looked like jello and maybe some broth. But a meal it was. All in all great strides were made on this day. There have even been moments when the sense of humor and the smile was back. I need one more day to figure out what to tell the people who have asked if they can visit. I am concerned that well meaning visits may have the result of going backwards. She loves all her friends so much that she might say have them all come over. What I have done here is ask a few people that have medical experience if they could visit on Wednesday. She is still very weak and the doctors have warned me that as much as she would like it there is the chance that a huge step backwards might happen if this is not done right.
She has huge resolve. She has one of those trapeze type devices on her bed and whenever she gets the chance she is pulling on that thing. She knows what she needs to do to get better. Nancy washed her hair this morning and did a fine job of helping her and advising all of us on how best to handle. She stayed overnight 2 nights. I cannot thank her enough. Some of you that know our family know that she also has faced come recent medical issues. But she helped us in this time at a level that that will always be remembered.
Oh, and by the way, Deb just moved off of the ICU. I will post again in the morning. Seems like new stuff comes all of the time. Two day ago I started to think that Deb might not ever walk through our front door again. Now I can kind of see her on the front porch asking me why the leaves have not been blown off. I think I better take care of that right now. It was a good day!
Stan
Monday, April 9, 2012
Mondays can be Good
Stan here:
I went up to hospital this morning and was met with a scene that did not look all that much better. I had heard that yesterday Deb had been able to really enjoy seeing her brother Jim and wife Nancy. She had spent about three hours talking with them. Nancy stayed overnight and the staff moved in a cot to help her sleep some. She is an RN and has really been helpful in this whole thing. Her daughter, Jen, is a ICU nurse and the two of them have a strong understanding of the issues and procedures of the ICU. So what seems to me like climbing Mt. Everest, they take a little more in stride.
One of the other things that happens is that weekends in hospitals do not have the staff availability of weekdays so it would appear to me that maintenance of the situation is done on the weekends and progress can be made in a higher form on normal work days. When I arrived this morning it seemed like Deb was having shorter breaths than before. So they had to get the whole thing moving on down to the x-ray to recheck the fluid on the lungs. The goal of today was to get that feeding tube pulled and they did not want to do so if the risk of having to put it back in again existed. The x-rays did show some fluid but the decision was made to pull the tube (which was really bothering Deb). That was done around 2:30 today. So sometime later today she will get her first meal. I do not think it will be a Logan's seven course deal. But it will be something. Like I said earlier we are thinking in small steps here.
I want to give you one more note of huge progress. For the first time the PT (physical therapy) people came in and they helped her sit on the side of the bed. Then, with one person on each side they had her stand up. I am so tempted to send you that picture but I think but it is important right now that my life continue to help her on another day. I am quite sure life would be over for me if I did so. Please just trust me! I was not sure she would stand again. Gotta remember here that she has not had her hair washed in 11 days and the picture might not make the next magazine cover, but believe me when I saw it was one of the finest pictures I have seen.
To settle one little thought from previous blogs. Do any of you really think I would eat the ears off of my own children's chocolate Easter bunnies? I do have an answer but I will save it till a later post. I will tell you for now I am innocent.
Stan (fun to post this one, we are gaining here.)
I went up to hospital this morning and was met with a scene that did not look all that much better. I had heard that yesterday Deb had been able to really enjoy seeing her brother Jim and wife Nancy. She had spent about three hours talking with them. Nancy stayed overnight and the staff moved in a cot to help her sleep some. She is an RN and has really been helpful in this whole thing. Her daughter, Jen, is a ICU nurse and the two of them have a strong understanding of the issues and procedures of the ICU. So what seems to me like climbing Mt. Everest, they take a little more in stride.
One of the other things that happens is that weekends in hospitals do not have the staff availability of weekdays so it would appear to me that maintenance of the situation is done on the weekends and progress can be made in a higher form on normal work days. When I arrived this morning it seemed like Deb was having shorter breaths than before. So they had to get the whole thing moving on down to the x-ray to recheck the fluid on the lungs. The goal of today was to get that feeding tube pulled and they did not want to do so if the risk of having to put it back in again existed. The x-rays did show some fluid but the decision was made to pull the tube (which was really bothering Deb). That was done around 2:30 today. So sometime later today she will get her first meal. I do not think it will be a Logan's seven course deal. But it will be something. Like I said earlier we are thinking in small steps here.
I want to give you one more note of huge progress. For the first time the PT (physical therapy) people came in and they helped her sit on the side of the bed. Then, with one person on each side they had her stand up. I am so tempted to send you that picture but I think but it is important right now that my life continue to help her on another day. I am quite sure life would be over for me if I did so. Please just trust me! I was not sure she would stand again. Gotta remember here that she has not had her hair washed in 11 days and the picture might not make the next magazine cover, but believe me when I saw it was one of the finest pictures I have seen.
To settle one little thought from previous blogs. Do any of you really think I would eat the ears off of my own children's chocolate Easter bunnies? I do have an answer but I will save it till a later post. I will tell you for now I am innocent.
Stan (fun to post this one, we are gaining here.)
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Easter Thoughts
Allow me to write today some thoughts. It is been my goal in this time to report the medical updates and this posting is not going to do that. Instead I wish to let some emotion flow on to the page. It is my wish that in so doing we all can reflect on some things that help enrich the quality of our lives. Seems like a good thing to do on this day.
Some years ago we had a very popular man from our church pass away quite suddenly. I recall the pastor of our church started the funeral message this way. "We would all give a lot right now to walk outside and see Marv with his hand resting on the hood of his car. His smile, his demeanor, his faith, his personality and every thing else about him is something we mourn for today." Instead of a message of sadness the pastor went on to bring a message of promise. As I sat and listened I thought and reflected on this man's life, but I still thought it was a strange start. As the years have gone by I have thought about that message. It has helped me understand that all of our emotions have an element of the desire to have things that are not to be, come back. I came downstairs at 4 this morning and right now I am recalling the many years that Deb would rise at around 6 on Easter and prepare for our children, the traditional Easter basket. Those of you that know her, know it had to be a special day for her to rise at 6. As I sit now and look at the fireplace let me yearn for the times when the Easter baskets were lined up on the mantel. The first kid would come down and complain that the ears were gone on his chocolate bunny. I would make sure that my shirt did not have any of the chocolate remnants and explain that I had no idea of what had happened. Later we would all get ready and go off to church. In past times we would always have some sort of choir or musical responsibilities. As I recall those days I encourage you on this day to let some of your memories come back to you. Rather than have them be clouded with sadness I ask that they bring to you a brighter emotion. That is what I am letting happen right now. I suggest on this Easter that you let some of these type of positive feelings "resurrect". I suggest if you do so, this will be a good Easter for you.
We have some friends that had a kid that was a good football player. As we attended some of the games I can clearly recall his grandfather sitting in the stands. As the years past I somehow came to the realization that there was nothing this kid could do to diminish the love and passion that this man had for his grandson. Good performance or bad. The grandfather is gone now. But the memory I have of his devotion to his grandson is something I will not forget. I encourage those of you who are parents and grandparents to pursue a similar passion and devotion to your offspring. I believe that as you do so, it will have enhance the meaning of Easter. Let the passion you have for your family "resurrect" in your soul on this day.
I played golf several weeks ago with a local dentist. Most of my friends know that these recent times have challenged us in a way that nobody would expect or want. This man had faced a large challenge some years previous and he told me something that helped me. He told me that life brings times for all of us that we need to mourn for our future. It is evident right now that this emotion has come to the forefront. How I wish that I could take Deb home today and have life return to a normal condition. She has always lived her life with a drive and passion that I think many of us do not have. She wanted one of those trapeze things over her bed so she could start to pull herself up. Mieke told me that she can only get one arm high enough to reach the thing. Yesterday was tough because she did not make all that much progress in her journey to recovery. Even with all the things that have taken place I sense that she will bring herself through this. It is with this confidence that we experience this Easter day. While it is true that we all have times that we "yearn for our past and mourn for our future," it is also true that the message of this day holds great promise. In whatever course these events take us, I am quite sure that the promise of this day will not be lost for our family. It is my hope that the same will be for you.
Thanks once again for your prayers and love. When you see Deb, make sure you tell her that you do not think it was me who ate the ears off the bunnies.
Stan
Some years ago we had a very popular man from our church pass away quite suddenly. I recall the pastor of our church started the funeral message this way. "We would all give a lot right now to walk outside and see Marv with his hand resting on the hood of his car. His smile, his demeanor, his faith, his personality and every thing else about him is something we mourn for today." Instead of a message of sadness the pastor went on to bring a message of promise. As I sat and listened I thought and reflected on this man's life, but I still thought it was a strange start. As the years have gone by I have thought about that message. It has helped me understand that all of our emotions have an element of the desire to have things that are not to be, come back. I came downstairs at 4 this morning and right now I am recalling the many years that Deb would rise at around 6 on Easter and prepare for our children, the traditional Easter basket. Those of you that know her, know it had to be a special day for her to rise at 6. As I sit now and look at the fireplace let me yearn for the times when the Easter baskets were lined up on the mantel. The first kid would come down and complain that the ears were gone on his chocolate bunny. I would make sure that my shirt did not have any of the chocolate remnants and explain that I had no idea of what had happened. Later we would all get ready and go off to church. In past times we would always have some sort of choir or musical responsibilities. As I recall those days I encourage you on this day to let some of your memories come back to you. Rather than have them be clouded with sadness I ask that they bring to you a brighter emotion. That is what I am letting happen right now. I suggest on this Easter that you let some of these type of positive feelings "resurrect". I suggest if you do so, this will be a good Easter for you.
We have some friends that had a kid that was a good football player. As we attended some of the games I can clearly recall his grandfather sitting in the stands. As the years past I somehow came to the realization that there was nothing this kid could do to diminish the love and passion that this man had for his grandson. Good performance or bad. The grandfather is gone now. But the memory I have of his devotion to his grandson is something I will not forget. I encourage those of you who are parents and grandparents to pursue a similar passion and devotion to your offspring. I believe that as you do so, it will have enhance the meaning of Easter. Let the passion you have for your family "resurrect" in your soul on this day.
I played golf several weeks ago with a local dentist. Most of my friends know that these recent times have challenged us in a way that nobody would expect or want. This man had faced a large challenge some years previous and he told me something that helped me. He told me that life brings times for all of us that we need to mourn for our future. It is evident right now that this emotion has come to the forefront. How I wish that I could take Deb home today and have life return to a normal condition. She has always lived her life with a drive and passion that I think many of us do not have. She wanted one of those trapeze things over her bed so she could start to pull herself up. Mieke told me that she can only get one arm high enough to reach the thing. Yesterday was tough because she did not make all that much progress in her journey to recovery. Even with all the things that have taken place I sense that she will bring herself through this. It is with this confidence that we experience this Easter day. While it is true that we all have times that we "yearn for our past and mourn for our future," it is also true that the message of this day holds great promise. In whatever course these events take us, I am quite sure that the promise of this day will not be lost for our family. It is my hope that the same will be for you.
Thanks once again for your prayers and love. When you see Deb, make sure you tell her that you do not think it was me who ate the ears off the bunnies.
Stan
Friday, April 6, 2012
Progress!!!
Stan Here:
I finally get to report some good stuff. Mieke has reported to me all day that Deb was having a day where each hour you could see things coming back. They changed her pain meds. I seemed that the stuff they were using was giving her problems. She was having hallucinations and all sorts of other confusion problems but after they changed drugs things started to get better. She asked Mieke if I could drive in tonight. When I arrived I found most of Deb back and much more normal. They had moved her from the bed to sort of a "bed chair" and she was sitting up. Normal conversations are starting to take place. Her voice is stronger and once in a while her smile shows up. At the same time any exertion toward the normal seems to take lots of energy and she quite quickly will fall off to sleep. During these times she seems to hear the conversation in the room and her eyes will open and she will offer some sort of opinion on what is going on.
I am still not quite sure she is able to process all the things that have happened to her in these last days. When I think about it there have been three large surgeries in the last week and it is hard for me to even process what she must be feeling. I do know one thing. She wants one of those trapeze type devices on her bed and I think she wants to picture herself pulling herself up in bed and starting the process of getting all the muscles working again. She said to the nurse to get stuff unhooked and she is going for a walk in the hall. When I heard this I kind of knew I had my wife back! I am told that for every day she had to be in the medically induced coma it takes about two days to restore the muscles needed to walk. Doing the math I think we are looking at about 8 days before there are any laps around the hall.
Mieke did spend a great deal of time reading to her all of the very nice comments you posted on the blog. Thank you so very much. She nods her head after each one. I am thinking she is not able to take them in right now in total but I sure she will spend hours reading them in the next week. Right now she still has a tube going down her throat to her stomach and she is plenty anxious to get that sucker out. So we go forward here in baby steps. One thing at a time and it seems to me progress is starting to happen. For the first time in 8 days she is being fed. Not solid food yet. This stuff comes in a bag and is pumped to her body and I do not even know how to spell the word good enough to have it pass the spell checker. It starts with inter. I think it ends with with the fact that she is now being fed. I was starting to worry about that. I was not aware the human body could go that long with out some food source.
OK, with all of this let me tell you something amazing. Mieke told me to walk through the ICU unit. I am going to say about 40 rooms. As I did so I came to an surprising conclusion. As tough as this has all been on us I think it is possible that Deb is in the best condition on the floor. I know we all have a lot of stuff to worry about. As I observed the situation I thought it might be smart to let you all know that as you you see something like this you become aware that many people do not have support group like we do. Additionally, I feel right now that our situation resides on a scale that has deeper and even more serious conditions for many. I think it might be smart for us to think about this on this weekend. It is going to be a different Easter for us. Ross is going to play at a big GR church. Easter sermons will be preached. But the fact remains that many will lay in a place were life hangs in the balance in a very serious way. On Sunday I am going to take a moment to reflect on this. This entire event has brought those facts clear to me in a way that I had not thought of before. I sense it is going to be a memorable Easter for me. Hope it is for you also. Thanks again for all of your many thoughts, prayers and expression. And Deb, welcome back!!!
Stan
I finally get to report some good stuff. Mieke has reported to me all day that Deb was having a day where each hour you could see things coming back. They changed her pain meds. I seemed that the stuff they were using was giving her problems. She was having hallucinations and all sorts of other confusion problems but after they changed drugs things started to get better. She asked Mieke if I could drive in tonight. When I arrived I found most of Deb back and much more normal. They had moved her from the bed to sort of a "bed chair" and she was sitting up. Normal conversations are starting to take place. Her voice is stronger and once in a while her smile shows up. At the same time any exertion toward the normal seems to take lots of energy and she quite quickly will fall off to sleep. During these times she seems to hear the conversation in the room and her eyes will open and she will offer some sort of opinion on what is going on.
I am still not quite sure she is able to process all the things that have happened to her in these last days. When I think about it there have been three large surgeries in the last week and it is hard for me to even process what she must be feeling. I do know one thing. She wants one of those trapeze type devices on her bed and I think she wants to picture herself pulling herself up in bed and starting the process of getting all the muscles working again. She said to the nurse to get stuff unhooked and she is going for a walk in the hall. When I heard this I kind of knew I had my wife back! I am told that for every day she had to be in the medically induced coma it takes about two days to restore the muscles needed to walk. Doing the math I think we are looking at about 8 days before there are any laps around the hall.
Mieke did spend a great deal of time reading to her all of the very nice comments you posted on the blog. Thank you so very much. She nods her head after each one. I am thinking she is not able to take them in right now in total but I sure she will spend hours reading them in the next week. Right now she still has a tube going down her throat to her stomach and she is plenty anxious to get that sucker out. So we go forward here in baby steps. One thing at a time and it seems to me progress is starting to happen. For the first time in 8 days she is being fed. Not solid food yet. This stuff comes in a bag and is pumped to her body and I do not even know how to spell the word good enough to have it pass the spell checker. It starts with inter. I think it ends with with the fact that she is now being fed. I was starting to worry about that. I was not aware the human body could go that long with out some food source.
OK, with all of this let me tell you something amazing. Mieke told me to walk through the ICU unit. I am going to say about 40 rooms. As I did so I came to an surprising conclusion. As tough as this has all been on us I think it is possible that Deb is in the best condition on the floor. I know we all have a lot of stuff to worry about. As I observed the situation I thought it might be smart to let you all know that as you you see something like this you become aware that many people do not have support group like we do. Additionally, I feel right now that our situation resides on a scale that has deeper and even more serious conditions for many. I think it might be smart for us to think about this on this weekend. It is going to be a different Easter for us. Ross is going to play at a big GR church. Easter sermons will be preached. But the fact remains that many will lay in a place were life hangs in the balance in a very serious way. On Sunday I am going to take a moment to reflect on this. This entire event has brought those facts clear to me in a way that I had not thought of before. I sense it is going to be a memorable Easter for me. Hope it is for you also. Thanks again for all of your many thoughts, prayers and expression. And Deb, welcome back!!!
Stan
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Recovery Milestone
Stan Here:
It has seemed to me that recovery could not start until the breathing tubes and support were removed. That happened this morning at around 9. To be frank I had visualized this in the form of a gradual welcome back to the world day, Deb we love you, we are all behind you etc. But the fact is that the re-entry into the world is a more intense process and it is wrapped with some confusion and plenty of pain. It seems she has some real pain which is very understandable. She is very swollen and quite black and blue and I would be less than honest if did not tell you it is the most difficult thing I have witnessed in the 40 years since I have known her. I have been assured by the ICU nurses that this is normal and that it takes about a day for the patient to return to a normal personality condition. I feel quite certain that she will endure this and we will proceed with the confidence that at some point the person we all know will be back in full form. One of the things that is becoming more evident is the recovery from this is going to involve more than I had thought of. For those of us closest to her we are kind of used to her waking up and shortly thereafter, grabbing her IV pole, and telling us she wants to go for a walk around the hospital. From what I am learning, it that is not going to happen that way this time. (although nothing would surprise me). It would appear at this point that there is going to be a lengthy time of rehab. From what I am learning we think the hospital stay will be at least ten more days and then perhaps some time in a rehab facility.
May I ask for one thing? Over this entire time (since Deb was first diagnosed) she has received electronic and card greetings. What we are doing now is reading these to her and even during the times when she has been under heavy sedation we have seen seen the emotion in her eyes and some tears as we do so. The fact is that she has always expressed and appreciated a close connection with her relatives, friends and acquaintances. So if I might ask, for those that know how to do so, if you could send a note to her on the post a comment section of these blogs, I think she would really appreciate it. I am thinking that as the days go by it might be nice for her to have these to read. I will tell you this. She has a way of taking these deep in to her heart and it is my thought that she needs this more than anything right now. I think she is in for kind of long road. At this moment I am not sure she totally understands the situation. I know her well enough to know that even a few lines from you will mean a lot to her. (So many of you have done this but I am not sure you know how much it has meant to her.) Many have asked if they can help in any way and for now I think this is all I can think of.
Thanks for all your concerns, prayers and everything else. Somehow I feel she is going to plow through all of this but right now it is kind of hard to picture. It has been a really tough time for us. I am truly thankful to all of you for your affection and concern as we experience this.
Stan
It has seemed to me that recovery could not start until the breathing tubes and support were removed. That happened this morning at around 9. To be frank I had visualized this in the form of a gradual welcome back to the world day, Deb we love you, we are all behind you etc. But the fact is that the re-entry into the world is a more intense process and it is wrapped with some confusion and plenty of pain. It seems she has some real pain which is very understandable. She is very swollen and quite black and blue and I would be less than honest if did not tell you it is the most difficult thing I have witnessed in the 40 years since I have known her. I have been assured by the ICU nurses that this is normal and that it takes about a day for the patient to return to a normal personality condition. I feel quite certain that she will endure this and we will proceed with the confidence that at some point the person we all know will be back in full form. One of the things that is becoming more evident is the recovery from this is going to involve more than I had thought of. For those of us closest to her we are kind of used to her waking up and shortly thereafter, grabbing her IV pole, and telling us she wants to go for a walk around the hospital. From what I am learning, it that is not going to happen that way this time. (although nothing would surprise me). It would appear at this point that there is going to be a lengthy time of rehab. From what I am learning we think the hospital stay will be at least ten more days and then perhaps some time in a rehab facility.
May I ask for one thing? Over this entire time (since Deb was first diagnosed) she has received electronic and card greetings. What we are doing now is reading these to her and even during the times when she has been under heavy sedation we have seen seen the emotion in her eyes and some tears as we do so. The fact is that she has always expressed and appreciated a close connection with her relatives, friends and acquaintances. So if I might ask, for those that know how to do so, if you could send a note to her on the post a comment section of these blogs, I think she would really appreciate it. I am thinking that as the days go by it might be nice for her to have these to read. I will tell you this. She has a way of taking these deep in to her heart and it is my thought that she needs this more than anything right now. I think she is in for kind of long road. At this moment I am not sure she totally understands the situation. I know her well enough to know that even a few lines from you will mean a lot to her. (So many of you have done this but I am not sure you know how much it has meant to her.) Many have asked if they can help in any way and for now I think this is all I can think of.
Thanks for all your concerns, prayers and everything else. Somehow I feel she is going to plow through all of this but right now it is kind of hard to picture. It has been a really tough time for us. I am truly thankful to all of you for your affection and concern as we experience this.
Stan
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Sigh of Relief
Preparing for this day has been nothing but hard. My mind never stopped thinking about mom as she lay very still in the hospital bed. I came up to her room early this morning and nobody was around. Just mom and me. I talked with her about the surgery and read all of the blog comments/emails/texts. She listened, and cried appropriately. You are all so tender with your words and prayers. We are both thankful for that. Then the nurse came in turned down her sedation meds a bit so she could respond a little more to me. Jackie was here now so the witnessed mom waking up. Mom mouthed questions like, where am I, and what it going on. She pointed to her stomach and asked what is happening. I tried to explain everything to her the best that I could and she seemed extremely confused. She gave lots of hand gestures waving goodbye and I said to give me a squeeze if she loved me. She squeezed and off she went. They explained that it is kind of like moving a three ring circus when they move someone from the ICU. They unhooked everything from the walls, and took her into the OR. Grandparents, friends, pastors, and others all waited anxiously for the report. A couple of hours later, both surgeons came to tell us how it went. I am very happy to share the good news. Surgery went well! They accomplished everything that they wanted to and she did well through the entire thing. She does have the ileostomy bag and will most likely have this for 3-6 months. They removed 2 more feet of her colon. They said that she hardly lost any blood during surgery and overall was hemodynamically very stable. She is now back in the ICU and is resting deeply after surgery. A team was just in here doing rounds and they are continually talking about taking her off of the ventilator support and when her body will be strong enough for that. I will try and update as I hear any more about this. For now, I am sitting next to her and trying my best to keep everyone updated. I am sorry because sometimes I don't feel medically adequate at all to share these reports. For those of us who just want to know how she is, I would say...she doesn't look like herself at all, she is very swollen, bruised, and has gone through way too much. It will probably be a long time before she can walk again. She might be in a wheelchair for the wedding. (A minor detail that is just fine with me, as long as she is there!) I won't try to hide the fact that this is not a good situation, but she is fighting, and is stronger than anyone I know. She will come through all of it. That I am sure of. I will write more when I know more. For now, please pray that she gains strength so that she can breath on her own.
Much love, Mieke
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Blue Eyes
Mieke here...
I am sitting next to mom in the ICU. I walked in and was scared by the machines hooked up from every part of my mom's body. Her arms are tied down, there are tubes coming from her nose, her mouth, and just about everywhere else. I was thinking, praying, and crying the whole way here as I thought about what this encounter would be like. ( I haven't seen here since surgery on Sunday night). I said, "Hi Mom." and she slowly turned her head, looked directly at my and raised her eyebrows with a very apparent look of excitement. I could see that she was happy to see me. Her blue eyes starred into mine and she started to cry. I don't know what is going on in her head but I do know that she heard what I was saying to her. I'm afraid I wasn't expecting this so I became a bit emotional and tears streamed down my face and dropped onto her very swollen hands. I told her how many people are praying for her and she shook her head. I read her all of the cards that were in the mail and I am quite confident that she heard them. Thank you to everyone who sent them. I then opened up her blog and read her dad's post and every comment. She had tears as I read them to her. You don't know how much they mean to us. Truly, she recognized all names by opening her eyes, then closed them to listen, and then a tear would drop when I finished reading. The nurse came in and told me that this was the most response she had seen from her all day. When she asked her if I was her baby, mom gave a big nod and opened her eyes. It is amazing how one can read emotion just from the look in ones eye. I asked mom if she was uncomfortable or in pain and she closed her eyes tight and gave a couple of nods. I took this as, "I am confused and scared, but they are taking good care of me." The nurse untied her arms and mom reached right over and held my hand. I hope that she won't be able to remember this time. If anybody posts a comment meant to be read to her, I promise we will read it directly to her.
The nurse turned up her sedation meds a bit because she was so alert. Now she seems to be resting very peacefully. I will be here tomorrow morning to report news from the surgery. Love to all, Mieke
Monday, April 2, 2012
HERE IS THE NEWS
Stan Here:
Seems like everyday there are some new things and this day was no exception. Things do remain as stable as they can get right now. The ICU unit monitors and controls the breathing and everything else. One of the kids asked me how I feel about this whole thing and very frankly, as this has unfolded, I have a few moments of sadness. The overwhelming emotion is that I just plain feel really sorry for her as she has to endure this. It has been very intimidating for me to see the equipment. Somehow I have reached the age of 60 I have only seen ICU units on TV and I have never quite understood the control they now have over the body and the monitoring levels they have. It is a lot of stuff. Tubes, TV's, IV's respirators and more others things that I am not sure I need to be around again soon.
They have set up a time for surgery which is 8:30 AM on Wednesday. I thought I was getting used to this surgery routine but one thing that changes is that surgery will start when the surgery team is ready because the patient is already there. One other change is that there is no recovery room for a sedated patient and she will be taken back to the room on the ICU. It has been mentioned that it is possible they will attempt to wake her and remove the breathing tubes late on Wednesday night but that is only if everything goes very well.
Her surgery doctor called me twice today to clarify things as it relates to Deb's condition. As dangerous as this whole thing looks to me they have made it clear that the ICU, and the graduation from that, is not at the forefront of concern. In other words the medical people think that the cancer is the greatest risk she faces and they seem assured that they will bring her through the problems related to this infection. I need to tell you about one little silver cloud, and I kind of need a silver cloud right now. Here it is. The biological defenses that the body builds to fight an infection, such as this, have been shown to have an impact on remaining cancer cells at a later time. So there is an element of truth that something like this will have an impact as she continues to fight off the primary disease that caused the whole problem in the first place. Now that would be something!!! I will keep you posted on that one.
Allow me to finish with one more thing. I must tell you that it was shocking to me and other members of our family to see Deb in a comatose state. She is bruised and somewhat bloated from the fluids and it has been a very stark experience for us. I visited this morning and was surprised to find her eyes open. When she is sedated they had had some problems with blood pressure going too low and they controlled this by letting her come to the brink of consciousness. So by blinking and some minor hand movement she had some ability to answer a question or two I asked her at 7 this morning. I tried to tell her what had happened and I asked her if she would like to have a long time pastor friend of hers (and mine) come and say a prayer later that morning. Two blinks for yes and one for no. I got two blinks and I went to my office and called Dave Breen. Dave came at 9:30AM. He came in the room and it appeared that Deb was in a very deep sleep. It kind of struck me compared to earlier in the morning. Dave did proceed to read a passage and carry on a short conversation with Deb. Than he said a prayer and at the end he said the word AMEN just slightly louder than the rest. Deb moved her head, opened her eyes, looked him right in the eye and mouthed the words "Thank You!" Later in the day she again opened her eyes but this time I could detect a look of pain and confusion. Since that time the ICU people have stabilized the medication to have blood pressure stay stable and to keep her under, which right now I think is really the best. The medications they are using has an amnesic effect so I am quite sure Deb will not remember any of this. At the same time it was amazing to me to witness this and in that moment appreciate the strength and resolve that she has always carried.
Yes we are in a tough spot right now. I write with the confidence that somehow she will endure this and live to post another day. Thanks for your prayers and expressions. They mean a lot right now.
Seems like everyday there are some new things and this day was no exception. Things do remain as stable as they can get right now. The ICU unit monitors and controls the breathing and everything else. One of the kids asked me how I feel about this whole thing and very frankly, as this has unfolded, I have a few moments of sadness. The overwhelming emotion is that I just plain feel really sorry for her as she has to endure this. It has been very intimidating for me to see the equipment. Somehow I have reached the age of 60 I have only seen ICU units on TV and I have never quite understood the control they now have over the body and the monitoring levels they have. It is a lot of stuff. Tubes, TV's, IV's respirators and more others things that I am not sure I need to be around again soon.
They have set up a time for surgery which is 8:30 AM on Wednesday. I thought I was getting used to this surgery routine but one thing that changes is that surgery will start when the surgery team is ready because the patient is already there. One other change is that there is no recovery room for a sedated patient and she will be taken back to the room on the ICU. It has been mentioned that it is possible they will attempt to wake her and remove the breathing tubes late on Wednesday night but that is only if everything goes very well.
Her surgery doctor called me twice today to clarify things as it relates to Deb's condition. As dangerous as this whole thing looks to me they have made it clear that the ICU, and the graduation from that, is not at the forefront of concern. In other words the medical people think that the cancer is the greatest risk she faces and they seem assured that they will bring her through the problems related to this infection. I need to tell you about one little silver cloud, and I kind of need a silver cloud right now. Here it is. The biological defenses that the body builds to fight an infection, such as this, have been shown to have an impact on remaining cancer cells at a later time. So there is an element of truth that something like this will have an impact as she continues to fight off the primary disease that caused the whole problem in the first place. Now that would be something!!! I will keep you posted on that one.
Allow me to finish with one more thing. I must tell you that it was shocking to me and other members of our family to see Deb in a comatose state. She is bruised and somewhat bloated from the fluids and it has been a very stark experience for us. I visited this morning and was surprised to find her eyes open. When she is sedated they had had some problems with blood pressure going too low and they controlled this by letting her come to the brink of consciousness. So by blinking and some minor hand movement she had some ability to answer a question or two I asked her at 7 this morning. I tried to tell her what had happened and I asked her if she would like to have a long time pastor friend of hers (and mine) come and say a prayer later that morning. Two blinks for yes and one for no. I got two blinks and I went to my office and called Dave Breen. Dave came at 9:30AM. He came in the room and it appeared that Deb was in a very deep sleep. It kind of struck me compared to earlier in the morning. Dave did proceed to read a passage and carry on a short conversation with Deb. Than he said a prayer and at the end he said the word AMEN just slightly louder than the rest. Deb moved her head, opened her eyes, looked him right in the eye and mouthed the words "Thank You!" Later in the day she again opened her eyes but this time I could detect a look of pain and confusion. Since that time the ICU people have stabilized the medication to have blood pressure stay stable and to keep her under, which right now I think is really the best. The medications they are using has an amnesic effect so I am quite sure Deb will not remember any of this. At the same time it was amazing to me to witness this and in that moment appreciate the strength and resolve that she has always carried.
Yes we are in a tough spot right now. I write with the confidence that somehow she will endure this and live to post another day. Thanks for your prayers and expressions. They mean a lot right now.
Sunday, April 1, 2012
This is Alden for the report after surgery. The surgery is complete, and it could have gone better. I am going to give the facts that I have, and try to be somewhat detailed for the people reading this that like to know exactly what is going on. The overall news is that she has had multiple complications, and recovery time will be much longer than we had hoped for after the initial surgery. It's hard to get doctors to put numbers out there, but one doctor mentioned it will be no less than 10 more days in the hospital.
The infection and problems were caused by a hole in the colon. Based on the fever starting Saturday we guess that it has been leaking its contents into her abdomen since then. The doctors reported that it was quite a rough situation in there, and they were very surprised Mom was not complaining more than she did was about her levels of pain. There are multiple complications that can arise from the bacteria in her abdomen, so pray that the complications are minimal. The surgeon had to remove 2 ft of her colon because of the stool material in her abdomen. That 2 ft was in the area of the highest amount of visible foreign material. Right now they have not reattached those sections. The nurse said it was probably clamped, but she has no more stool material in her system so that is fine. They will hopefully be able to reattach it during the next surgery.
They worked hard to clean her up as much as possible, and will have to go back in to check on things, and potentially clean more, in 2 days. Since they are going to go back in on Tuesday, they choose to use a "vacuum seal" to close her incision, instead of the typical sutures that would be used.
Because of the way they have the incision closed, and because of the colon being clamped, or unattached, Mom is sedated and on a breathing tube. She will be so until the next surgery/surgeries are complete, or potentially for a few days following the surgery planned for Tuesday.
Surgeons removed the port they planned to use to administer Chemo to her abdomen, to protect again further infection, and installed another port to administer fluids to her over the coming days.
Only immediate family is to visit her until she is conscious again, and ready for visitors. Unfortunately we have no idea when this will be, but I know someone will definitely post on this blog when she is ready for some friends and family to come help encourage her through this. Doctors said her number one threat is still the cancer, and that this whole setback is unfortunate, but we will overcome it. We know that Deb is a tough women, and she will handle her current set back as good as anyone in the world could do.
We still have no reports from the pathology lab about the spots and tumor removed during Thursdays surgery. Hopefully that will come Thurs or Fri.
We have all confidence that she will continue to fight and that she is in good hands, but please continue to keep Deb in your thoughts and prayers. We will update the blog as much as possible as we are now back in a constantly changing situation.
The infection and problems were caused by a hole in the colon. Based on the fever starting Saturday we guess that it has been leaking its contents into her abdomen since then. The doctors reported that it was quite a rough situation in there, and they were very surprised Mom was not complaining more than she did was about her levels of pain. There are multiple complications that can arise from the bacteria in her abdomen, so pray that the complications are minimal. The surgeon had to remove 2 ft of her colon because of the stool material in her abdomen. That 2 ft was in the area of the highest amount of visible foreign material. Right now they have not reattached those sections. The nurse said it was probably clamped, but she has no more stool material in her system so that is fine. They will hopefully be able to reattach it during the next surgery.
They worked hard to clean her up as much as possible, and will have to go back in to check on things, and potentially clean more, in 2 days. Since they are going to go back in on Tuesday, they choose to use a "vacuum seal" to close her incision, instead of the typical sutures that would be used.
Because of the way they have the incision closed, and because of the colon being clamped, or unattached, Mom is sedated and on a breathing tube. She will be so until the next surgery/surgeries are complete, or potentially for a few days following the surgery planned for Tuesday.
Surgeons removed the port they planned to use to administer Chemo to her abdomen, to protect again further infection, and installed another port to administer fluids to her over the coming days.
Only immediate family is to visit her until she is conscious again, and ready for visitors. Unfortunately we have no idea when this will be, but I know someone will definitely post on this blog when she is ready for some friends and family to come help encourage her through this. Doctors said her number one threat is still the cancer, and that this whole setback is unfortunate, but we will overcome it. We know that Deb is a tough women, and she will handle her current set back as good as anyone in the world could do.
We still have no reports from the pathology lab about the spots and tumor removed during Thursdays surgery. Hopefully that will come Thurs or Fri.
We have all confidence that she will continue to fight and that she is in good hands, but please continue to keep Deb in your thoughts and prayers. We will update the blog as much as possible as we are now back in a constantly changing situation.
Surgery #3
Hello everyone, this is Mieke. We want to keep you all updated because things have changed here at the hospital. I am finding myself, once again, sitting in the waiting room. Mom has just gone in for another surgery. They came to the decision that surgery was best because the site of the infection could not be identified and she was not getting any better after a series of antibiotics. Today she was consistently short of breath with a high pulse. Something is just not right in her body and there is no way of determining what is going on with routine tests. The doctor who performed the very first surgery, back in August, is currently operating to try and figure out what is going on inside of her. There might be some type of tear in her intestines or bowels. This seems to be the only likely cause of all the problems that her body is struggling to fight. Please pray that they find the cause of the infection during this surgery and that they are able to fix it.
This turn of events certainly was not expected or pleasant. As her family, it is hard to watch her not get any better. She was not scared one bit to go into surgery. Mostly she just wanted an answer. Today has probably been the longest day of her life. She said that multiple times. Of course the hospital places a big black ticking clock right in front of her bed. She starred at it all day hoping and watched the time pass by slowly. At this time we can't have any visitors outside of our immediate family. Thank you for prayers and support.
-Mieke
This turn of events certainly was not expected or pleasant. As her family, it is hard to watch her not get any better. She was not scared one bit to go into surgery. Mostly she just wanted an answer. Today has probably been the longest day of her life. She said that multiple times. Of course the hospital places a big black ticking clock right in front of her bed. She starred at it all day hoping and watched the time pass by slowly. At this time we can't have any visitors outside of our immediate family. Thank you for prayers and support.
-Mieke
Not expected
We have been trying to report the good news but lately we have had a few adventures, so allow me to update. Last night things had seemed to be stable. Ross had a concert to play less than 1/2 mile from the hospital and Deb suggested that. I go, so I did. Rumy had volunteered to stay with Deb so that I could do this. Turns out that as the night went on problems started to develope. The hint of some temperature problems that we had seen earlier in the day escalated quickly and resulted one of the harder nights in this entire health event. Before I share the details let me first thank Rumy for her care and concern and her wisdom and as she involved herself in this.
Turns out that as the night went on temperature, shivers and anything else you can think of resulted in a change of rooms and a trip and stay at the criticle care unit. A unexpected infection has entered the picture and brought the need to have close monitoring of the situation. For those of us who do not work in the medical arena it is very intense to witness this. At the same time we have been assured that this is not a life threatening event. On the other hand it is true that it has everyone's attention an it is serious.
Right now a team of doctors is trying to identify the source of the infection so that it can be treated. Deb is very weak and has some real pain. Visiting on this unit is not part of the picture. Mieke is with her right now. I am home trying to get a little sleep so that I can help later. I will update as things change but for now that is the news.
Thanks for all your prayers and concern.
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